Where Useless Advice Breeds Counseling

Do you need advice? Advice that only a person pretending to be a celebrity
could answer for entertainment purposes only?
Then you've come to the correct place: GrudgeLine.
Here at GrudgeLine, we've assembled a cracked staff to solved your daily problems.
Please send your question to

Dear Grudgeline,
I wanna make my parents build my own house so I can stop being a momma´s boy,but they won´t let me! They keep nagging me and beaking my [bleep]. I want to have my own place so i can [bleep] wherever I want,wipe my [bleep] with a towel and ask the neighbor to borrow some money without my mom yelling that I shuoldn´t do that. What should I do?

Dear Anonymous,
Okayokayokayokay. Don't get me started on parents. Or rules. Or asking for some [bleep] money from [bleep] who have some when I don't. Get the [bleep] money and [bleep] buy the [bleep] house! Okay? Okay. In fact, [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] superindendent [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep]! [bleep] [bleep]! Okay? [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] Okay! [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] you at the drive through! [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep]! God bless.
-Joe Pesci

Dear Grudgeline
I can't think of a decent new question to ask you people. I want one that sounds cool and funny, not contrived. I can't think of anything other than this one, and even this one is getting really old really fast. Could you please give me some suggestions?

Dear Afgncaap5,
Not to worry. You're doing fine so far. Here's what you do. Release your question as is and make millions. If you can, merchandise it to death. It's too bad Afgncaap5 is your name and not the name of a merchandisable character in your question--especially if that character were only in it for a few seconds. Then what you do is wait 20 years and re-release your question with some extras--you know, tighter graphics, more storm-troopers, and additional scenes. Throw some prequel questions into the mix and you'll be so wealthy you won't even care that your fans have come to hate you. May the force be with you.
-George Lucas

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