Where Useless Advice Breeds Counseling

Do you need advice? Advice that only a person pretending to be a celebrity
could answer for entertainment purposes only?
Then you've come to the correct place: GrudgeLine.
Here at GrudgeLine, we've assembled a cracked staff to solved your daily problems.
Please send your question to

Dear Grudgeline,
- Yahoo! Auto Response

Dear Yahoo!,
You can't be serious! We take time out of our day to compose and send you an e-mail message notifying you of another great GrudgeLine work, and you tell us to call later? This is unbelievable! The heighth of rudeness! I've never seen such poor behavior! I protest! I protest your e-mail and I protest you! I'm filing a grievance with the authorities. You'll never e-mail in this town again! You cannot be serious!
-John McEnroe

Dear Grudgeline,
I was once provided some advice on the Grudge-Match (TM) website to persue the career of Fairy Princess (TM) [Grudge-Match, The Age of Wireless, "Battle of the Seven Deadly Sins,"]. Unfortunately, after three years of wearing nothing but pink and constantly having to wake up early to fix my hair, I have decided that enough is enough and am now a student at an Institute of Higher Learning (TM). I have been thoroughly contented thus far in my studies in Archaeology and Social Anthropology (TM) and have begun my thesis on the "Socio-cultural Importance of Fairy Princesses to Darwinian-Style Natural Selection," (TM). My dilemna is this: outside of the Institute of Higher Learning (TM) I am becoming increasingly aggravated by what can only be known as The Intellectually-Lacking General Public (TM). Please, tell me how I can cope with day to day living outside of my academically nurturing environment. How does one deal appropriately with stupid people?
Thank you for your time,
-Kara Darkblood, St John's College, Oxford University

Dear Kara,
- Yahoo! Auto Response

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